I had lunch with a friend the other day and she said (and I am loosely quoting her), “So, what kinds of questions should I ask my mom? We talk every week and I’d like to learn more about her.”

Shouldn’t we inherently know what to say to someone as close to us as a parent?

Of course not! In fact, it is often more difficult to ask questions of those we are closest to. We already know so much about them, so what else is there to ask, right? Wrong! I remember my mom retelling stories. She always told them exactly the same way – with completly right or slightly off details – ever time. When I was in college, I had an epiphany and thought, “Why don’t I ask her questions rather than just zoning out while she rehashes the story about driving to the city without a license when she was 15.” (They did that in the 1930s.) So I asked – and I learned. And suddenly her stories became a lot more compelling.

So, back to my friend. I gave her a few starter questions and she reported back that she learned some new things about her 90-something-year-old mom! Isn’t that great?

For the rest of you, here are some conversation starters:

1. What was your favorite subject in grade school?

2. How did grandma and grandpa meet?

3. When did you get your first television set (or radio) and what programs did you like?

4. What historical events affected you most?

5. At what age did you take your first paying job?

P.S. Don’t forget to write down their anwers.